Guilty Pleasure..

I think this is a real funny interpretation of guilty pleasure.. Oh, no, Harry Potter is not my guilty pleasure.. And so is Twilight.

.Anybody who tell me that he doesn't have a guilty pleasure means that either he has no life or in a bigger chance, he's lying.. So, since I do have life and I can't really tell if I'm a bigass liar, I guess, I have a guilty pleasure.. Fine, scratch that, make it, A FEW guilty pleasure.. Okay, I mean, its cool to have guilty pleasures.. Everybody have it.. at least one (even though I'm pretty sure that the chance is very low that its even hard to call it a chance).. Actually, to tell you the truth, I have never realise the existence of this particular guilty pleasure until yesterday.. The day that I was supposed to be wondering ALONE in Alamanda, Putrajaya because my friends can't make it with me.. Pathetically sad, yes.. But the good thing is, I found out my - another - guilty pleasure..

I must admit, this picture is beautiful and yet, quite exaggerating for my post this time..

Again, no! It does not have anything to do with boys either and neither is their cocks.. Its just what they're wearing.. You know how some girls like to spend their money on beautiful sexy lingeries with extra laces? Yeah, it happens to me too, minus the laces.. and maybe not the lingerie part too (because it just felt weird for a single 18 to have lingeries).. So, yep, I have passion for undies.. This may sound a bit awkward but honestly, I just love to collect beautiful and branded undies.. Or specifically, trunks.. I used to wear briefs and I still wore them occasionally, but I never have a boxer before.. I know, most guys nowadays prefer boxers as their favourite undergarment because they reckon briefs or trunks are holding their willies too tight and uncomfortable.. But personally, for me, wearing underwear is more than your own comfort, its how you feel when you wear it.. Its how your confidence rose when you wear them.. And thats how I felt when I wear expensive undies.. But still, not all briefs and trunks are uncomfortable.. Unless, you are wearing cheap made in China crap that is design specifically to make your dick shrink a few sizes.. And for boxers, my valid reasons for not having them are (a) boxers are just some mere, lame, and boring version of underwear (especially the ordinary checkered type.. I mean, just say 'boxer' and the first thing that would come across our mind is that cliche version of boxers.. How lame is that?).. and (b) I am pretty sure that boxers doesn't act much as an underwear.. Look, the old Indian had invented the underwear so that they would have something to hold their balls.. Therefore, obviously, boxers do not hold our balls and act more like a short shorts than underwear as the Indian opposes.. Since its not an ordinary to find a sexy and beautiful, briefs, I end up with various type of trunks.. and my favourite are the low-waist and low-rise trunks.. Just in case if you guys are wondering if I also have my collection of thongs or jockstraps.. Sorry to disappoint you, no, I dont have thongs and jockstraps.. Just to get pass the cashier is odd enough for an 18 like me with that kind of erotic undergarments..

I know, its weird for a young lad like me to have such passion, but honestly, eventhough its not quite publicly visible, I just felt more confident with myself wearing them.. This does not mean that my self-esteem is basically based on my underwear, its just the same way how some people love to flaunt their designer apparels to feel confident about themselves.. Except that I dont really flaunt them -I mean, you don't actually imagine me walking around the city with only my underwear, right?.. However, still, a passion is a passion like you can't really blame a guy for liking pizza the same way I like trunks.. I know, pizza and trunks is not the same thing, yet, I believe you don't actually decide to love pizza, right? It just happened and the same thing occurs to me.. In a different form..

So, the actual incident that brought me to this realisation of having this guilty pleasure is after I paid the cashier almost RM40 (plus minus 13USD) for that one piece of trunk you can see above (except that mine is orange, not purple).. To be honest, thats still not the most expensive trunk I ever had.. But it just struck me at that particular moment that I am obsess with trunks after looking back the other trunks I had at home.. The reason that I bought this trunk is only that I never heard of that brand before and its quite pricey.. So, I thought, maybe I should give it a try, hoping that it is another international branded trunks to add to my collection.. Seriously, how crazy is that?! My mum does not born me together with cold hard cash.. So, I dont really have my own personal income other than my weekly pocket money and spending them on undies seems rather wasteful to some.. But for me, it feels all worthy.. The idea of me having a new branded underwear makes me more alive.. Its hard to explain it, but I guess its the same feeling as when you get to watch a marathon of your favourite TV show; all excited and corny.. Oh, just so you know, I just googled and found out that skinXwear is a Malaysian underwear brand.. How surprise I am thinking back that it is almost just as good as my precious 2(x)ist.. The material is so smooth and light that I would think that I wore nothing if I put aside the fact that my dick is well positioned.. To spice thing up, the material is almost see through (if you stretch it long enough) and the pouch for your cock is well put.. It just fit you well.. And oh, not to mention, its low-waist; my fave.. 

Back to the thing, the main thing that made me feel this passion guilty is that I had never actually told my parents bout this.. I had never even show them my trunks.. Except the one they bought me.. I manage it real well that I had never left a single clue to them.. The boxes are the first thing I would get rid off.. And I never washed it with my other laundries.. I wash them in my own bathroom and dry them in my room.. You might think, whats wrong if my mum found out that I have beautiful undies.. Blimmey, you dont want your mum to found out that you are wearing brightly coloured undies with net.. Its just odd and I'm not ready to face it yet..  However, you can't hide forever, right? Earlier this year, my mum was helping me to tidy up my room -eventhough I had done everything to made her believe that I'll do it on my own because I never did - and guess what she found? My sexiest trunk.. It was like a brief, but with net on the side making it a trunk.. As my mum was holding it, I saw the weird stare in her face at that thing before I quickly grab it and hide it somewhere else.. Now you know how more weird it would get if my mum found it in the laundry basket.. Lucky enough for me, she didn't bring up that net underwear during our dinner.. 

I guess, this is quite a long post to be talking bout underwear, so, I guess, I'll call this an end before I start making more craps.. I know, this post would be controversial for my schoolmates but I reckon, I dont give a damn.. 

La Musique

This is going to be a real short post.. Obviously, its bout the music you're listening in the background, hence the title of this post.. Right now, Nathan Barr had been my most favourite musician.. Looking at the album cover above, as you folks had expected, he's the one responsible for the beautiful music scores on True Blood.. Did I mention that I am a True Blood die hard fan(g)? Now you know.. 

The reason I really love this guy is the fact that besides being the composer to his wonderful musics, he's also well known for playing those songs himself! Now thats a wonder.. I mean, whats not amazing with a guy who could write sheets of harmony musics and play all those instruments himself! Violin, cello, piano, you name it, he plays it..  He also had wrote music scores on the famous movie Shutter and Hostel.. I adore him and his magnum opuses.. Well, its irony that he wrote the scores for True Blood which is highly proclaimed as the metaphor of the LGBT community and in 2010, he came out by telling people that he's bisexual.. It seems like more of this kind of people is coming out of the closet as if Ricky Martin had started the revolution.. To make things even more controversial, he is also named as one of the hundred most influential LGBT individuals of the year by OUT magazine (never heard of that magazine before.. But what I know, its a magazine.. and thats that.).. 

That music you're listening to, its not 'First Taste' as the title on the muzicons suggests.. Actually, the music is 'Bill and Sookie's Theme'.. If you're True Blood's fan(g), you might notice this music when it comes to the erotic scenes involving vampire Bill and Sookie.. Take a deep listen to the music and you'll see that its a perfect music to fuck a vampire.. I mean, its all gloomy in an erotic sense and mysterious in the same time.. A recipe for a wonderful stay-in-mind vampire-fucking session.. 

However, I cant really say that this is Nathan's best piece.. Theres lots more harmonically well composed music, but this is the one that can remind us to most of the other of them.. Try listening to this music and watch the actual scene.. You'll notice that its not really the exact background music! But still, there's still a hint this 'Bill and Sookie's theme' in those other musics.. They may not be identical twins, but for sure, they're siblings.. You know, similar hair colour, shape of face, and everything.. What I love most bout this music is that its just wonderful! its an orchestra of harmony music accompanied with passion and feelings that you might not get in ordinary music piece.. Above all that, its a classic piece of modern art.. a lovely one, clearly..

Just so you know, my favourite Nathan's music scores are 'Vampire Love', 'First Taste', 'Unpacking Gran' and 'Grieve to Grave to Groove'.. These are all available in True Blood's OST ; season 1, 2, or 3.. So, enjoy this music and I hope you'll like it too..

Freedom

Okay.. The mark of a society to be free is the idea of allowing everyone to be fucking idiot and a cunt sucking bitch simultaneously.. The fact that people have the right to be able to make their voice audible to everyone is also the kind of freedom we have in our country.. Yep, you can make your voice heard to literally anyone as long as it doesn't get you shoved in the ass with another problem that you might kill yourself with.. I'm not talking bout rights crap or whatever.. I'm talking bout how smart people seems to be stupid enough to be very shallow when it comes to judging stuffs and spreading around that shitty opinion around.. resulting in the judged one loosing half of his/her self esteem.. 

It all started with my awesome and beautiful (or what Adrian describe as ANTM shot) Facebook profile picture which turns out to be somewhat motherfucking controversial;

Oh, hi hotness!

I have no idea if its the society I'm living in or the picture itself is controversial.. You tell me.. First, if this picture is really that controversial, I have no intention to have it that way and to tell you the truth, I can't see in any way this picture could be that controversial.. Unless you say being hot is controversial.. Well, theres several obvious remarks regarding this picture and some of 'em are good remarks and some of 'em are hideously sarcastic good remarks.. So, both them annoy me to the limit that I start to ignore every single effing comments under that picture.. Personally, I think its good to give honest comments on things but honesty also have its limit.. in both ways - either good remarks or bad remarks.. Example, if you see somebody with the face of a shithole, you can't just be completely honest and tell that guy (I'm not being sexist, this is just an example) that his face looks like shithole.. Instead, you can still be honest by using a lot nicer word to substitute shithole with word such as ugly (giving the fact that that person obviously looks nothing more like a cunt, he probably know that he's ugly and by saying that he looks like a shithole is an obvious insult to him compared to ugly).. And the same thing goes to compliments.. Too honest compliment might sound like (a) you're flirting or seducing someone, or (b) you're delivering an insulting sarcasm.. Either way, its not really a good way of complimenting, especially the latter.. 

Behind all this nagging, the actual story is that as soon as I posted this picture on my Facebook, I instantly received a pile of crap telling me how good I look in that pic which most of 'em are obvious acrimonies.. Its not that I dont appreciate those kind and generous remarks, its just that the last i checked, I am still a human being and still capable of having normal emotion.. Hence, if you say, I should be proud of the comments, I say, 'welcome back to Earth.. Hows the weather at Mars?'... Even a brainless tad wouldn't be that happy with such remarks.. I don't know if they're actually being just super honest or like I said before, its just plain mockery (I'm pretty sure that they're not trying to seduce me whatsoever because that would be just gross).. Still, if you guys really meant it (the good remarks, not the mockery, obviously), I reckon I owe you my gratification and to those who don't, all of you can be my cankerous, shit-stained, cunt-suck, cum-covered, cock-mongling, ass-fucking, dick-fisting, baby-raping, jizz-chugging, waste of a human being.. Rather than wasting your time on your effort of trying to be the pain in my ass, you should really use it instead to meet a shrink because you are clearly lacking of sense of humanity since I suppose, you enjoy seeing people like me being publicly humiliated.. Which I don't.. 

That - the bad sarcasm -  is one thing.. Another thing is talking shit bout me right behind my back.. To those folks, I crossed my fingers to have you reading this.. First of all, I know, gossiping is human nature.. Who could live without gossips.. Thats the exact purpose of the plethora of those tabloid newspapers and shitty gossip magazine; to feed us, the homo sapiens with stories about fake boobs so that we could survive the next day.. I know, its fun to gossip about your friends, your bosses, or even you colleagues, as long as it remains a gossip as in hearsay.. Which means, the identity of that particular person who started it is kept anonymous.. Still, people can't really stay anon especially if you're not that smart to be one.. So, the thing is, back to my wondrous pic, well, one of my schoolmate (Thats what I heard but I'm pretty sure theres piles more of 'em.. However, I dont really know this guy but what I know is that he's in the same highschool as me..) told my other friend that I looked uneasily GAY in that pic.. Okay, we have two things here.. First, that bad hearsay.. And second, that typical homophobic labeling.. Both of 'em - an extra juice of exhilarating fucking shit in my stomach.. Regarding the hearsay, well, actually I'm totally cool with gossips.. I've been used to people saying things behind my back.. Unfortunately, most of the time, I know these people.. So, it sure does annoy me to have some strangers (Well, I dont really know him.. I guess, its safe to consider him as stranger) talking shit behind my back.. Seriously, what the fuck?! I dont even know you and you already start telling people that I look gay in my own pic?? Dude, that just got you into my douche list.. Congratz! 

Next, the labeling issue.. I totally have no problem with homosexuals (although I found trannies are quite disturbing) and for me, whatever regarding others sexual orientation - be they straight, bisexual, gay, lesbian, or even disoriented (is it even possible) - is everyone personal issues.. I mean, having gay friends (especially if you're so sure bout it) doesn't mean that you get to be nosy so that you could annoyingly look down at them.. Still, I'm not claiming that wherever they jam their dicks into (esp. places where they're not supposed to be) is a right thing to do.. This time, I'm going for the natural side.. I know, the law of nature forbid us to fuck those of the same sex as us.. And even religions claim it to be sinful.. However, most of the time, theres still homosexuals who restrain themselves from fucking around but get married those of the opposite sex and breed till they're dead.. This is because, that kind of homosexuals are obviously, don't want to be one.. When they're still fetus, there's no computerized system of choosing their desired sexuality.. Even the mums don't have vending machine to choose their child from.. I am also pretty sure that those homosexuals don't really choose to be one.. Imagine, how could you change your liking from one gender to the other? Lets say, I am attracted to girls.. And somehow, I got the idea of turning gay because it sounds like fun.. So, I approaches some guys to make myself turned on.. Maybe I'll start with babysteps before going with larger steps into these gay stuffs.. You know what, honestly, I reckon I would never even make it to the larger steps.. I say, if a baby is three years old and still not walking, its not the babysteps the baby took is wrong, the baby is genetically ill.. Can't agree? Maybe you should give it a try.. And let me know if you manage to get full erection with cocks under your nose.. So, the point is, for me, being a homosexual is hard enough.. Especially when you're in a community which take it as quite a taboo.. Therefore, I don't really think by calling other people gays with the intention of insulting them is cool.. Its as if you're putting gay people in the lowest rank of society along with bitches and the other damned fucked ups for the fact that they had enough of their life.. I mean, go and ask any homosexuals if they really want to be straight, and they might probably tell you they would die to be one.. Its just that how could you be proud of who you are when the whole world is trying to make your life fucking miserable.. And by using the gays misery to put other people who aren't is just evil and a typical sign of offensive homophobic behaviour.. I thought the boobs enlargement creams commercials on local networks are offensive too.. But do we crack at them? Yes.. We make fun of them, calling them all dicks, and make them gold comedy.. Maybe its just human nature to put offensive material on others as a way to make them feel like they're better than the rest.. Resulting on calling everyone a gay when they felt insecure of themselves.. Tell you what, fuck them... Fuck these people.. They say God hate fags but what they never notice is that they're calling non-fags fags in a way of insulting which is just another sin after putting people of certain sexual orientation in the lowest hierarchy of society.. So, double sins there.. Again, I'm not actually defending the homosexuals, but I'm just showing a bit of empathy here..

Book Review: Nineteen Minutes - Jodi Picoult

My rating: ❤❤❤❤♡

"Ask a random kid today if she wants to be popular and she'll tell you no, even if the truth is that if she was in a desert dying of thirst and had the choice between a glass of water and instant popularity, she'd probably choose the latter. See, you can't admit to wanting it, because that makes you less cool. To be truly popular, it has to look like it's something you are, when in reality, it's what you make yourself."

-Peter Houghton-

Like usual, Jodi Picoult came with a sharp issue which not much of us had the chance to see, let alone feel.. Well, this book is really a wonderful book.. It is a book of emotion.. A narration of the warmth and coldness of the heartfelt.. Observer had claimed this book to be memorable and mind you, thats the truth.. It remains to linger on our head even long after you had finished it.. As a matter of fact, right after I finished reading the book, I was staring still at the cover like a statue for quite half an hour.. I just couldn't believe what I had just read.. Its real hard to explain it here, you just have to read it to feel it.. Its a sensation that no other author can bring you through a mere reading other than Picoult.. Tell you what, this book, is an impossible to put down.. You can't just read halfway and not wanting to know what would happen next..

This book mainly revolve around the life of an American teenager, Peter Houghton.. Well, Peter is not quite one of the popular kids in school.. And not even in the middle.. If there's a hierarchy, he would be at the bottom.. Practically, he's the typical high school loser.. For a start, he does have the cliche loser characteristics; thick glasses, Adam's apple with the size of a fist, skinny figure, and of course, lack of friends.. By lack, maybe I should say, none.. Unless you consider HTML codes as friends.. So, being a social retard doesn't mean that he is as invisible as the furniture, but he was the most sought out kid in school.. He always got picked on by the other dudes he always refer as the jocks or the popular kids.. Its not the fact that he has that loser look that made him bullied or anything, its just that he is Peter.. Being him means that he was supposed to get picked on.. 12 years of his life since kindergarten, he was constantly bullied by everyone around him.. To get thing even worst, even the girl that used to be his friend betrayed him on their 6th grade to be with the cooler bunch of kids.. One day, few days after being humiliated (again) by the popular kids, he decided to bring four guns to school.. Of course, he murdered 10 people, including one teacher and hurt 19 others.. Hence, the story also revolve around Peter's trial at the court with his lawyer, Jordan McAfee..

This story is based on the theme of masks and persona.. Its how some people doesn't always looks like what they seems to be.. How some people struggle between personas in finding themselves.. I can't really elaborate this thing or I might spill up more spoilers.. However, this book had me realise that sometimes, murder is not always a bad thing.. I'm not saying that in the end Peter got away with his doing, but sometimes, thats the only thing to stop all the sufferings.. yes, you'll suffer more in prison, but at least you get to tell the world how you felt.. How people are ignoring you when you begged for their mercy or helps.. How thing would be different if only the just put down their ugly cunt of ego.. This book had really got me all emotional.. It also thought me how your own cruelty doesn't actually wins you anything but cruelty in return.. What I'm trying to say is, the whole high school students hierarchy is just a plain shit on crackers.. Even though I never got the chance to feel what its like being at the bottom, but reading this made me live it.. Empathy is all it took to make you realise that there's no fucking need to rank others for the fact that you're nothing much more than the other.. We're all the same, for God's sake.. I can't imagine how people had the guts to say they're better than the other.. Unless, you're Queen Elizabeth.. I understand that some people are gifted with things that God granted to only few lucky people (for example; good look, muscles, big cock), but being a perfect specimen does not give you the golden pass to look at the others like they're some crappy assholes.. It just doesn't work that way.. Being cocky doesn't make you any more attractive but effing despicable.. Honestly, I really hate those kind of guys (I'm not saying that I'm not one of 'em! jk..)..

The whole storyline is narrated in two timeline alternating each other.. While the present story is going on, what happened in the past is also alternately narrated chronologically.. So, actually, there's two chronology in this book but both relating to each other.. This way of writing actually let the reader to get dissolved in one situation before knowing what actually had happened or would happen.. Its really a good and unique technique so that you won't have to stuck at one scene for too long.. Believe me, you won't want to read half of the book with only court scenes.. For the ending, this story is not a cliche at all.. Of course, Peter is going to jail for his deeds, but there's more shocking scenes revealed as you turn over.. Like the theme suggest, some people are just unpredictable.. Like usual, Jodi had also manage to end her story with something that could make you choke with tears.. The ending is a sad one and also as unexpected as it could be..

So, just to wrap things up, Nineteen Minute is a worthy page-turner.. Trust me this book is all you need to get yourself craving for more of Jodi.. Or maybe the other work as well, I dont know.. But Jodi sure is a gifted writer.. Right now, I am reading Man and Boy by Tony Parsons (expect it for the upcoming book review) and frankly speaking, its nothing like Jodi Picoult.. I kinda miss her writing style.. Jodi wrote in a language that I imagined had been patented as her original artwork.. You can't find another writer as capable of Jodi in delivering all those emotions and big issue without having her readers addicted for more of her.. Its like smoking a literature pot, i tell you.. Anyway, this book is really a good read..

Semi-moved

I know, it had been a while since I updated this baby.. Its just that, lately, I had been quite busy with stuffs.. So, here are the summarized few things that you guys missed;

• Happy birthday to you.. Squashed potatoes and glue.. You look like a monkey, and you act like one too (in the cliche happy birthday song rhythm and tone) Okay, actually its my lil sis birthday.. You might remember her from the drama queen post.. Nothing much happened, except the usual annoyance and the drama that she put on..
• I passed my car license test.. Still, if you already expecting the Ode to Joy playing in the background, well, I dont know.. I just felt.... nothing?!

Back to the main thing, I had just semi-moved.. I know, the word seems weird enough for me too.. However, i reckon its quite fancy compared to half-moved which remind me of half-boiled eggs.. Don't ask me why, I wished I had the answer too.. In case you're wondering - of fucking course you do - what the hell I'm talking bout, I had just moved somewhere temporarily until our 'real' home is ready.. This whole mess is actually by the fact that we're moving to another state without the home buying process things - adult stuffs, is supposed - is done.. However, my mum had to start working here like, the day after we moved in and yeah, we have to settle down first at this not-so-lovely house in a middle of nowhere.. really, nowhere..

So, we arrived yesterday and my mum told me that we are just to live here for a while until our real lovely home is ready for us.. By temporary, I knew she didn't really meant that.. And by that, I'm not saying a couple of weeks.. It might just be more than a fucking month.. Well, in two weeks, we are going to Bali, and I believe by that time, we'll still be stucked in this shit hole..

If you already think that I am just acting all exaggerating pansy bitch, tell you what, the fact is, this house really felt nothing better than living in an old shipwreck.. Actually, this is our house, but not really our home, since we never had stayed for more than a week.. But, however, since we can't afford a comfortable hotel for the whole month, this house was the result of our desperateness.. Its not like I'm not supporting my parents for their works and all (my dad just told me that he had just got promoted), and I am totally not complaining being here knowing that its like the least I could do in showing my support this family..

Well, the thing is, this is one old house of ours.. So, there's not even much furniture here.. As a matter of fact, I'm not sure if we could call these stuffs furnitures.. The house is all dusty and gloomy.. Although its concrete, I still manage to imagine the wall collapsing burying me alive.. and virgin.. However, the worst thing is, because of the lacking of furniture and the collapsing rooms, we ended up staying the bunch of us (good thing my sis is in boarding school) in one fucking little cunt room.. You read that right, one room.. For one month.. Three of us.. Cool.. If you're asking why we don't move stuffs from our old home here, well, like I said before, we just semi-moved.. And it was supposed to be temporary.. Little fucking did I know that one month is temporary.. Being in one room with my family is one thing.. Loosing all my privacy in an instant is another.. I mean, how awkward is it to watch late night show with your parents snoring their heads off right next to you.. Oh, and just so you know, we don't have satellite channels here.. So, my life totally depends on the local networks to survive, which is another pain in the ass.. Its not really a good thing, you know, to keep a teenager in an uncomfortable place like this.. You might drive them crazy.. and blimmey, I'm already close to.. 

However, its not all entirely bad thing here.. My neighbour has a cute persian cat which my Mum describe as the cute squirrel-tailed cat.. Her tail - the cat, not my mum - could be the most fluffy thing I had ever seen in the whole world after cotton candy, of course.. She has those green eyes that make you feel like wanting to have them for exchange with yours.. Thats how cute the cat is.. The night we arrived here, while my dad was struggling with our front gate, the cat was sitting right next to our father watching him doing it.. And she even sat on our porch that night watching us while we're getting our things inside.. The bad thing is, she wont let me or any other strangers touch her lovely fur, except her owners.. Just to be honest, I am damn jealous of her (the owner).. You know what, this evening, as I was waiting for my mum to pick me up outside our house for dinner (oh, did I mention that staying here means that I probably have no chance at all to have home made meals?), that cat literally catwalked to her owner's car wating for her to get out of the car.. God.. One day, I wish I have a cat that would wait for me when I got back from work..

I dont like to move it, move it.. I dont like to move it, move it..
Gosh, I'll kill myself later for that joke..